My musical misgivings

Music is a language almost anyone can understand.

It’s also one in which I should remain mute.

I have attempted to master it before, but, in truth have never been close.

There have been attempts to release my musical talents, and each one further proves there is no talent to be released.

WordPress Discover has made “music” today’s prompt, and has made me meander through my musical misgivings.

I’ve lip synced, which resulted in a funny failure each time.

Once, to entertain the masses on Valentine’s Day, I agreed to lip sync while draped in a red, sequined dress.

It stretched over a styrofoam bosom meant to give me the look of the stereotypical lady who sings when things are over.

I regretted my agreement from the start, and again when I had to be duct-taped into the outfit. I regretted it even more when the duct tape was removed to peel me out of it.

This came years after my piano career stalled in the third grade thanks to my stubborn left hand. It could have at least let me learn “Let It Be.”

For all of my musical failures, there have been a few successes.

I am an occasional air guitarist and air drummer.

There are several other instruments in my air-repertoire, enough for a one-man band.

I consider myself a semi-pro lyric changer.

I must be a decent shower singer, because those performances are standing-room-only.

Despite my lack of real talent, music is wonderful.

It can be a welcome relief when one’s needed — even if it’s just for the few minutes you’re lost in a good song — which may be the reason for all of my attempts to speak the musical language.

If only I could find the Rosetta Stone which will unlock its secrets.

Maybe I’ll try the harmonica.